#Zane rants

[zanenindroid]

Zane Rants

I...dont understand? How come Cole is always referred to as the chill hot guy in the group, that should be MY role, my super power IS being chill, it's my thing, and how can you be hot AND chill, it's one or the other, how come you think he's so hot anyways? he's a Lego figure. LEGO! are you hearing yourself? you are horny for a Lego figure, that uses his friends' tooth brush, and LEAVES THE TOILET SEAT UP. I am not jealous. far from it. i pity Cole, for being so mischaracterized by the public, but most importantly i pity you dear viewer for thinking that this hack of a human being, who only came to this earth because some frauds decided it was funny if a Lego figure had black hair and so drew him into existence, meanwhile i was one of the first created. Cole. Was. A. Mistake.

[zanenindroid]

I have a life...i will not always risk wasting it chasing around my fellow ninja. There's 3 of them, meaning 6 legs that aren't broken, not sure why mine always has to be the one to get broken..is it because i'm a robot? i am...offended

One thing I am yet to understand is why they didn’t send Zane after Jay when he got sent away, since he lost before Jay. Like I know logistically they needed Zane there but also…

[silkieluv]

I seriously hate it when people start to villainize characters (let’s say, Kai) just to make more (let’s say, Jay) angst

Like no Rodrick, Kai didn’t beat Jay up for flirting with Nya. You know why? Because by that time Jay was better than Kai (Jay got more training since it was just the start and he joined 2nd, not 4th), and then Kai and Jay spend like every hour of the day together whether it’s training, eating or just chilling.

Yes, Kai will always be Nya's #1, but to the point he would beat Jay up?? Are you demented??

No, Jane, Nya wasn’t abusive towards Jay and forced him into a relationship. That in your sick head so you could have a reason for their breakup so you could ship Jay and Cole! (No hate to Bruise. Bruise supremacy)

NO, ALEX, OKAY? SKYLOR ISNT HOMOPHOBIC AND HER AND KAI DIDNT BREAK UP BECAUSE SHE FOUND OUT KAI ALSO LIKES BOYS.

NO, DENNIS, JAY KAI AND COLE WOULD NEVER BULLY ZANE TO HURT HIM THEN LAUGH AT HIM

SHUT UP, KIM. ED AND EDNA ARE BEAUITFUL PARENTS AND YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF TRYING TO TURN THEM EVIL JUST FOR MORE JAY ANGST.

Shame 🫵🏻.

[llannasvsp]

I JUST LOVE THEM ALL SO MUCH THEY'RE JUST LITTLE SILLIES. NOTHING BAD WILL EVER HAPPEN TO THEM. TRUST.

I HAVE TOO. MANY. EMOTIONS. ABOUT THEM. HELP.

[jojilovesninjas]

How I feel when I do my daily scroll through the ninjago Subreddit and see mother fuckers are still complaining about the redesigns. ITS BEEN 7 YEARS LET IT THE FUCK GO GUYS!!!

[kindaasrikal]

Lloyd absolutely enjoys tackling people. Like out of pure random. Cole could be holding cake and that would still not keep him safe from a dragoni human hybrid with unimaginable power to full on tackle him and then run away cackling.

Kai does that thing with Nya where they both tickle each other at random. Like one second they’re all serious in a meeting, the next Wu has to pull them apart because Nya poked a very specific, very ticklish area on Kai’s waist that made him squeak like a lil girl. Kai also gets his revenge by jabbing his arm into her armpit to tickle her and it aches hours later.

Cole enjoys walking into Jay’s room after he’s been there for hours just to annoy him. Like Jay’s just trying to play a video game, or maybe talk to someone on the phone, and Cole just walks in and starts annoying him. Touches the screen of the game to make Jay lose, starts talking about embarrassing stuff about Jay rlly loudly, lays and spreads himself over his bed. Zane walks in after hearing screaming and insulting and kinda just watches. He finds it hilarious.

Whenever it’s late and they need to wake one of them up, Zane always volunteers because he makes his eyes shine the brightest blue ever and stares wide eyed at the person- let’s say Lloyd in this one- and uses a completely stupid accent to say their name as a whisper echo thing. “Lloyd….Lloyddddd……” in a British accent is all he can hear before opening his eyes in confusion only to see a dark figure with glowing blue eyes towering over him.

No, Nya, he did not throw a pillow at Zane whilst screaming higher than even Kai can. That was her imagination.

Im sorry guys i just need them acting more like siblings because they would absolutely do this.

[caricabubamarica]

Since I’ve discovered Lego Ninjago at the ripe age of seven, the biggest fantasy of mine has always been to be one of the ninja on the team, fighting alongside the core four and dealing with Serpentine and so on. When I was a little girl, the only way I could satisfy the urge was to use my imagination.

So when the Covid 19 hit back in 2020, and I discovered Wattpad for the first time in my life, it was as if I had entered a whole new world based off of the imagination of other people all across the world. I was spending days and nights on it until there was nothing worth reading for me.

Back in 2022, I finally decided to catch up on the show, seeing it pop up on my Netflix account and decided to give it a go. Before so, I had developed a habit of reading dozens of fan fictions about the show I was at the moment hooked onto, so once I finished watching all of the Ninjago seasons, I went through any fan fiction on Wattpad that I could find regarding Ninjago x reader/original character and quickly noticed a pattern that made me grow bored of whatever book I was reading rather quickly.

Every single fan fiction, save for few rare ones, had the main character be an elemental master of darkness/destruction.

Every. Single. One.

Now at first, I thought the issue stemmed from the fact that there was an obvious lack of originality and uniqueness, but it actually originated from the fact that every story had the exact same storyline, and I mean the exact same one.

The main character would be an elemental master of darkness/destruction and because the elemental powers are inherited, the character is obviously the child of Lord Garmadon and a sibling of Lloyd. Of course, let’s not forget that the character has extreme protectiveness over Lloyd and despises their mother with concerning levels of rage. They are always stubborn and a badass character who never does no wrong and is always in the right and somehow knows exactly what is going to happen but still messes up so the plot can continue as it originally does.

They are also, obviously, the fifth ninja who also possesses a golden weapon of their own, which is usually the most useless thing to ever exist. During the Season 2: Legacy of the Green Ninja, they are in most cases turned to the bad side because their power is unbeatable but it is then somehow beatable because the plot obviously has to move on. Not to mention, they are the only ninja who can use their elemental powers without the golden weapons because they are just that good.

I can guarantee that if anyone goes to Wattpad right now and tries to find a longer Ninjago book with the character insert, they would find at least few books who resemble this exact description. Why? Because the idea of a character, other than Garmadon, who is an elemental master of darkness and destruction is a great plot and idea for the character in Ninjago realm, but none of them actually think outside the box when it comes to actually executing it.

For example, when they write the character to be the fifth ninja and the fifth protector of the fifth golden weapon and the prophesied green savior, why don’t they write about the fact that the element of darkness and destruction is the toughest for Lloyd to master because he refuses to become like his father and because the element itself takes a toll on the mind of the one who possesses it?

Or why don’t they write about the fact that the reason the Ninjago realm is not perfect is because the First Spinjitzu Master used the element of destruction to create something, only for it to come back to bite him in the ass?

Why don’t they give the character the arc of trying to master their elemental power after Lloyd gives each of the ninja a piece of his golden power in Season 3: Rebooted, only for them to go down the wrong path?

Why don’t they write about the inner conflict the child of Lord Garmadon who inherited his elemental powers would have when they see that what others call a gift, in their case it is called a curse? Why don’t they expand on the feelings of envy the child would feel towards Lloyd for being praised and cherished for his destiny while they are looked down on for their own?

There is so many different possibilities to that plot device and yet I have yet to see someone do it properly.

I apologize if this offends anyone but it has been bugging me for three years now and I had to write it down somewhere where I could hear different opinions about it. I am not trying to shame anyone on their work or anything, if that is what you want to write, go for it, I am a nobody with no life who is still hung up on a kids show that aired back in 2011.

Enjoy what you want, love what you want, and take this how you want. Luv ya!

[toastingpencils37]

The fact that when his friends heard this they probably interpreted it in the metaphorical this will be our last battle and they fighting will all be over after we defeat him kind of way rather than the this will by my last battle by your side kind of way.

[wompwompland]

YOU KNOW WHAT I WOULD'VE LOVED TO SEE? THE IMPACT OF ZANE BEING THE ICE EMPEROR FOR 60 YEARS.

HE WAS THE ICE EMPEROR LONGER THAN HE'S BEEN A NINJA.

HE KILLED ALMOST ALL OF THE YETIS. HE FROZE THE FORMLING VILLAGE. HE CORRUPTED THE SAMURAI. All of that goes against his base directive - to protect those who cannot protect themselves.

I NEED to see the emotional impact on Zane, and eventually the rest of the team. Bonus points if it comes with seeing the impact on Zane's body, since he definitely didn't get any maintenance in his time in the Never-Realm.

[juanaa-ii]

I don’t know if there are any fics on this but it would’ve been so funny if the plot point wasn’t that Mike isn’t a lawyer but that he isn’t from Harvard.

Nothing major changes except for like the prison arc (and a few other misunderstandings). I’m pretty sure the timeline checks out—if a little wonky. Mike is brilliant enough that I’m sure he got a lot of scholarship offers.

He picks Harvard like he originally did and gets banned because he sold tests to the Dean’s daughter (like he originally did) the only difference is that he went to a different school (still Ivy league because of Mike’s big brain) like Yale or Cornell. In fact, I bet he did go to Yale and he absolutely hates Harvard douchebags (even though Yale has douchebags—NOT THE POINT)

Anyways. The secret wouldn’t be big. In fact it’d be comical. Mike still works to put in the effort to fit in with the rest of the Harvard associates, he still goes about his cases as he usually does, he’s just not from Harvard. Jessica doesn’t react with the whole ‘this is gonna get me fired’ it’s more of ‘why the hell did you hire outside of our motto?’ And Rachel isn’t all ‘you should quit’ it’s more of ‘I can’t believe you kept this from me’ but also, later on, very relieved (when she’s accepted into Columbia).

The best part is that some would think he’s a fraud. Like Louis. I think the writers could have used Louis ‘figuring out Mike is a fraud’ plot as like a comical thing that lasts episodes (like it did in the show) only for him to find out that Mike is just from Yale and it would be a anticlimactic reveal but Louis takes it personally and he’s all ‘I cant believe you damaged our integrity’ or whatever.

But yeah. Mike’s legit. He’s just not for Harvard. So no, he still doesn’t know where Harvard students get their pizza but at least he knows where Yale students get drunk. And that whole plot of that girl he dated who broke up with him after he lied about being a lawyer? I think if I tweaked it, he’d be like ‘I’m a big shot lawyer’ and she finds out he’s not or that he’s still a student.

He’d have a part time job at the legal clinic he worked at with Oliver and Nate. And that’d be why the girl breaks up with him, because he lied about how much of a big shot he was but at least he wasn’t a fraud. Actually working at a legal clinic works perfectly because it’d be the job he takes instead of a bike messenger.

Even better, there would be scenes of Mike accidentally running into his old Yale classmates in front of or near the Harvard associates or someone like Rachel, Jessica, Louis, and Mike is just absolutely panicking about it.

[zanenindroid]

Zane Rants - Jay's Prank

Today, during our training session, Jay thought it would be amusing to replace my tea with motor oil. While I appreciate his attempt at humor, the taste left much to be desired. Note to self: remind Jay that my fuel preferences are not up for experimentation. 🤖☕️

[mittenslikescats]

I wanna punch these ppl

I find it funny that so many of those ninjago nostalgia accounts on instagram will say that season 2 of the og show is peak and they’ll only acknowledge either the last episode or the episodes on the Dark Island. And yet they’ll NEVER mention the filler episodes. Like mf don’t say the whole season is peak and not show half of. Like they need to understand the difference between a ‘peak episode’ and a ‘peak season’.

Also ppl (nostalgia fans) only say it’s peak BECAUSE of the finale episode. Like yeah it’s iconic but we’ve had better endings. (Like seabound for example is a better ending for some ppl it’s just just based on opinion) But if u say that u’ll get jumped because only really old 2013 ninjago can have good endings.

It’s honestly really sad at how much backlash DR gets on instagram BECAUSE of these nostalgia accounts. Like they’ll hate on anything from the writing, the world, the characters. I’ve seen ppl complain about complaining about Lloyd having an anxiety disorder (with their fans are cheering them on from the sidelines). Ppl saying Lord Ras is a mid villain because he’s not Chen or some other old villain. There’s literally no other reason it’s just ‘he’s not Chen so he’s mid’. Like wtf is that kind of point?

Whenever I dare to actually read the comments I’ll find a rare ‘I like dragons rising’ comment u see nothing but backlash from other ppl. I get ppl are subjective to their own opinion but holy shit dude someone saying the like dragons rising doesn’t mean they hate the og show. Ppl over there act like ur committing a fucking crime if u say u enjoy dragons rising.

[cosmothealien358]

Cole must've been so traumatized bc of the transition from human to ghost and then later back to human. I can just imagine him crying uncontrollably as he relearns the joys of being human

Like, c'mon, just:

Zane, poking his head into Cole's room: How do you like the curry I made? 

Zane, sticking his whole head inside: Cole?

Cole, holding a bowl of rice and curry, sobbing his eyes out: Uh-huh? 

[llannasvsp]

IM ACTUALLY WHEEZING THIS IS SO HILAROUS

guys if you haven't, you NEED to subscribe to brent miller's youtube channel there are so many gems like this on there

also im absolutely convinced that vincent is just kai irl

[al-luviec]

zane + nya parallels

[kindaasrikal]

Kai headcanons because I’m tired and cant think of anything else:

Kai both does and doesn’t have a concept of monetary value. Like imagine they go grocery shopping and they need to buy essentials like ingredients, veggies, hygiene stuff to stock up on. Like usually whenever the other ninja went with their families they were able to buy some extras like candy or toys, maybe some more clothes despite having many just cause they like it or smth. With Kai? This guy slaps it out of their hands and says it’s not worth the waste when they’re only here for essentials. Wu gave them money for that only, so they best budget and make sure they can buy everything they need and maybe some extras of those things or else. None of them realise how confused Wu is when a proud Kai returns believing he saved up money by being smart and responsible, when Wu actually gave them extras to use there as like an implied thing. But when it comes to things of value, this guys has no idea what to do, take for example with Ronin. He had no idea how much the thing could cost but knew they had to pay it or else. But he’s also horrible at negotiating because he can’t properly understand the worth of what they’re negotiating the deal on and can’t see when it might be worse or better.

Kai was a shockingly quiet kid. Like yes he was still ‘aggressive’ and rude, but like never spoke on his own. Nya was always the talker between the two, but even she doesn’t talk as much as often. So usually Kai would silently accept a lot of things as a child until he grew older and got a bit of an attitude so despite being often silent that one quiet kid in the back who does everything right will and probably has cussed you out if you step out of line.

Nya actually cut Kai’s hair when they were younger because she was bored and Kai fell for her trap and ended up thinking it wad a great idea since his hair had gotten too long. She messed it up however since, you know, she was like max 6, and Kai’s hair came out nothing like the picture they had of their dads. Kai almost cried at how it didn’t turn out like how he wanted when Nya giggled and said his hair looks like a “Really cool fireee!”. No, Nya does not remember that she’s the reason Kai keeps his hair like that.

Kai loves fish, he likes dragging Nya outside to summon some and makes her stay with him until he’s bored. Nya likes eating fish.

Kai likes jumping into his rlly bulky and tall mechs and then posing like a school girl or a cute model in them. Jay once managed to convince him to Jojo pose and they distracted an enemy because of it. Cole and Lloyd cussed them out, except Cole couldn’t stop laughing and Lloyd’s hair kept blowing in the wind dramatically every time he changed his position so it looked like he posing. He made them run up and down the monastery mountain steps five times each way. Cole too.

You know those really cute candle holders? So like Kai convinced Pixal to make him a fire proof bear suit, wore it outside in the dark, in the middle of the training ground, with everyone asleep. He lit himself on fire and he looked like a glowing monster bear with teeth and blood (shadows and ketchup, he was hungry). He thought it looked cute and cool. Zane screaming, malfunctioning, and then screeching “THY BEAST MUST BE SLAIN!” And shooting ice at him was not a part of the plan (Zane watched Macbeth the movie before sleeping). Both refuse to apologise to each other but after a day of ignoring one another Jay watches as Kai clings to a Zane full koala like when he’s doing chores.

Cole tries to teach Kai how to draw. Kai, for the life of him, cannot. Even stickmen look wonky and wrong.

Kai, surprisingly enough, has amazing handwriting. Everyone gets him to write stuff like letters for them because either theres is worse then a kid in nursery, or they wanna impress someone.

Kai really likes having something around his arms, like bandages, gloves, cloth, anything. For special events, he lets Cole tie silk ribbons around his arms like bandages.

Kai wishes he had soft hands. Everyone loves the feeling of his rough hands though. It comforts them.

Kai also loves cracking his knuckles. He loves doing it around Wu, who hates the noise and smacks Kai with his staff, who cackles and does it again.

At bad times in his life, Kai sits and lights a fire when the moon is at its highest point, out in the dark where it’s cold.

Kai loves stealing Jay’s action figures by accident. Jay was annoyed at first until he saw Nya giving Skylor an unintentional wide eyed look whilst holding a doll after Skylor said “oh, yeah i forget i had this old thing, don’t really like it tbh” disinterestedly. Jay put together whats what when Skylor blinked and said Nya could have it with a grin, who legit giggled. Nya. Giggling. Jay puts his action figures on a shelf and never touches them, giving an impression to someone who isn’t a collector (who couldn’t afford to be one) that they aren’t that important. Jay begins buying more action figures and other stuff he usually wouldn’t but knows Kai or Nya would love and leave it somewhere like it’s always been there. Says something under is breath just loud enough for a peeping ear to hear about how he might throw it away, and the next day its gone. Sometimes, he outright hands it to them saying he doesn’t like it but doesn’t wanna waste it. The other ninja, plus Pixal and Wu, pick up whats going on and do the same. Later in the years (after the re-design and sog) Kai and Nya long picked up on whats going on, they still love it regardless because it makes them feel less guilty (no no guys they definitely didn’t break down sobbing after Jay gave them a water themed colouring book for adults and Kai a mimic of Mitsuri Kanroji’s sword from demon slayer (a fake), definitely not.)

(Lowkey just realised this is very similar to a Morro fanfic of ao3, No i did not realise it when i wrote it but i do now, its where Morro likes collecting seemingly useless stuff left in places no one would leave smth special at. It’s because Morro was a homeless orphan, so he takes useless things in to give them importance. Love that head canon and fanfic it’s on ao3 guys omg. Imagine resurrected Morro doing that and Kai and Nya just realising in horror that THEY do that too. They get it, and dammit Morro is more similar to them than they would’ve liked.)

Kai totally likes wearing those happy birthday head bands even when it’s not his birthday and acts like he isn’t. If someone says happy birthday to him, he looks at them all judgy like and says “Its not my birthday? What gave you that impression?”

Kai actually easily gets sick, and hates it. The others have to time his down so he’ll actually get rest and not just push through it regardless. It takes summoning the duo of Wu AND Maya to get him to stop.

When the og four ninja met for the first time and right after they stopped Garmadon and got back to their realm, they still hadn’t actually gotten to know each other so Kai used to run away from them like the secret introvert he was groomed into being and it took Nya tackling him to get him to finally play those “super cringy bonding games”

Kai was subjected to Lloyd’s glowing green eyes staring at him constantly with no words exchanged. When the silence got too much and Lloyd just kept staring Kai asks what his problem is. Lloyd says “oh nothing, muchacho” and Kai realises Lloyd is still petty over what happened in the first episode.

Yeah thats all i got i think I’m sick shdgfv